8.10.2005 |  Control

posted by Jon
15:45 | SAY SOMETHING |



It's exciting not knowing what the future holds. Being single, I feel like I have a lot of control over what happens to me, and in a sense, I do. Obviously, God is ultimately in control, but it boils down to the whole Free Will discussion, which isn't the point of this post. I guess the point is that I could pack up and move to another state by the end of October if I wanted to.

What would happen if I did that? I might find a better paying job and a cheap apartment. I might find a girlfriend. I might not find a girlfriend, and I might take 2 jobs just to keep from getting bored. I might make new friends, or I might become a loner and feel displaced.

There are some certainties in my life right now. I know that I am comfortable where I am. I already have a great job, and there is my church, family, and friends to keep me sane. I don't have a girlfriend, but I'm more optimistic about that than I used to be. I feel an attachment to this place that I don't think will go away if I ever choose to move. Not that I couldn't be happy elsewhere, it's just that this place FEELS like home. It's a strange but awesome feeling.

Plus, while I am sure there are people out there in other areas who would make great friends, I can't help but love the ones I have in my own church and town like only close Christian brothers and sisters can love each other (even the ones that annoy me or who I don't know very well...they probably don't read this blog anyway). Nobody's perfect, me especially, but what makes you guys so cool is how we've all dealt with our imperfections. Friendships don't get stronger without the down days.

I don't think I'll be moving any time soon, unless something really changes that I can't foresee. In a sense, I don't even know what will happen if I stay here. At least I know that my life isn't totally under my control (that would suck).